An On-line PSA

Ok...so this one isn't about a single bad date. It's about the source of many bad dates. On-line dating services.

Now, don't get me wrong, I've met a number of good men through a variety of on-line services. One of those men has become one of my dearest friends, another is one of my staunchest supporters. I love them both dearly, and each has enriched my life in so many ways. I've fallen for some, enjoyed the company of others -- and have been appalled by the behavior of many.

Much has been written about the anonymity of the Internet and the behavior that it can inspire. I'm not going to get into that. Personally, I think that just like any communication tool, it has its good and its bad. But I just wonder who raised some of these men or taught them how to interact with women.

I am tired of getting emails that ask about my eagerness and/or ability to perform oral sex. Some people think you just get this on something like Adult Friend Finder. No, kids. You get it on each and every site. I'm willing to bet that if eHarmony hadn't rejected my atheist self, I'd be having good, Christian men asking me if I spit or swallow before they even know my name. If I want you to know, I'll show you. But I don't want it to be the first thing you ask me. In fact, men, you shouldn't even ask at all -- it will cut down on your chances of ever finding out for yourself.

Also, don't ask me my bra size. Are you buying me one? I'll tell you if you're on your way to La Perla with your black AmEx.

The thing is, the men who are going to use on-line dating services are covering their bases -- they are on every site. Every time I go to a new site to investigate, my search uncovers the same 45 men. Forty of whom I don't have much interest in -- either because we've already met or they just scream "bad date" from their profile.

Don't get me wrong, men have as much right to be picky as any woman. But men, please come correct. You're going to be happier with the response you get from me if you ask me a grown up question. Asking me about my "wildest sexual adventure" assures that you will never BE the answer to that question.

What's the best way to catch my attention? Ask me about the last book I read. Ask me if I'm watching A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. Ask me if I liked that latest Jay-Z. Better yet, appeal to my basest interests and ask me if I think he and Beyonce will get married. Or if Lindsay Lohan has a shot at staying sober.

And if we meet, tell me my shoes are hot. The last man to do that got to know all of the other answers first hand.

Ya dig?